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there is a saying in Lu's Spring and Autumn: "know its wind by hearing its voice, know its ambition by its wind, and know its virtue by its will."

you can get a general idea of a person's character by speaking in a voice.

when someone opens his mouth, it is like a bolt from the blue, which is frightening, while others always speak gently and make people feel like a spring breeze.

the volume of speaking can not determine the level of ability, but it can reveal the true self-cultivation.

be quiet and convince people with reasoning

Di Zi Gui says: "the situation is convincing, but the heart is not, the heart is not, and Fang is speechless."

when there are differences between people, they will inadvertently fall into a volume contest, and it seems that the louder the voice, the more dominant it will be.

in fact, harsh words cannot confuse black and white, nor will whispers drown out the truth.

Lu Longqi in the Ming Dynasty was good at convincing people with reason and educating the people.

after he took office, he changed his usual sloppy attitude.

when the date of submission was approaching, he organized a mobilization meeting and explained:

in case someone delays being blamed by the staff, you will suffer from the flesh and flesh; to me, I will be blamed for owing food.

these solid and thorough words make people willing to accept and willingly pay on time.

there is a saying in the Book of Rites: "when the water is deep, it flows slowly, and when people are expensive, it is late to speak."

the deeper the water is, the calmer the water is; the more skillful a person is, the less impatient he is to speak.

there are two idioms in China: righteousness and righteousness.

reasonable, Qi is strong; Justice, words are important: these are the expression of human instinct.

but the scholar Lei Baohua said: be upright and gentle, and be righteous and euphemistic.

the difference in one word represents a person's tolerance and magnanimity.

it's reasonable, but it's not loud.

in interpersonal communication, what can really convince people is never momentum and reason, but attitude and conduct.

words are not full of words, people are sentimental

Bai Juyi once said, "those who move people's hearts do not precede feelings."

put emotion first and attack the heart first.

in the face of conflict, if you can sympathize with it, you can often get twice the result with half the effort.

Wang Yangming was falsely accused of colluding with King Ning.

officers and soldiers who did not know the truth kept making trouble and slandered that Wang Yangming had embezzled the property of King Ning.

in this regard, Wang Yangming was not angry or confronted, but instead booed and asked about their warmth.

first of all, he arranged for some residents to return to their hometown ahead of time to vacate a lot of houses.

then he came out and told him, "now that it's winter, you can live in those houses with straw and quilts. Don't freeze."

Wang Yangming's sincerity made everyone ashamed and moved.

as the saying goes, "be sensible and reasonable."

Man is an emotional animal.

the touch between heart and heart is far better than garrulous words and admonition.

when subordinates make misstatements again:

someone shouted: do you want to quit?

some people asked in a low voice: have you encountered any difficulties?

when children fail in the exam:

someone yelled: look at your grades, you'll know how to play.

others said softly: let's analyze the reasons together and try to do well in the next exam!

when the wife burns the meal:

some people complain that even a meal can't be cooked well.

some people put down what they are doing and ask, "are you uncomfortable to see that you don't look well?"

in comparison, the intimidation, criticism and questioning of the former and the curiosity, concern and action of the latter can reach the hearts of the people and solve problems more directly.

Napoleon once said, "he who can control his emotions is greater than a general who can take down a city."

having emotions is an instinct, but emotions can't deal with problems.

when you overcome your instincts and lower the volume, you will find that what can win cooperation is sincere giving, and what can influence others is empathy in one's shoes.

is not high-pitched, in order to love others

Li Bai has a poem saying: "the dangerous building is high and white, and the stars can be picked by the hand." Don't dare to speak loudly, for fear of startling heaven and earth. "

when the poet spent the night at Fengding Temple, he felt so close to the "man in heaven" that he dared not speak loudly.

this "dare not" is not "fear", but humility and awe.

the higher the level of a person, the more he knows how to put down his posture and lower the volume.

Zhuo Wenjun, known as one of the "four talented women", is a female model with high EQ in ancient times.

at first, Sima Xiangru, who looked like an aristocratic son, played a song "the Phoenix seeks the Phoenix", which made Zhuo Wenjun fall in love at a glance.

however, after the two eloped back to Chengdu, Zhuo Wenjun knew that Sima Xiangru, who is famous all over the world, had already fallen in the middle of his family.

in the face of Sima Xiangru's silence and the four walls of his family, Zhuo Wenjun did not get hysterical, but silently began to live a life of poverty.

paragraphTime later, Zhuo Wenjun cautiously suggested: "go back to my hometown, not so down and out."

so they sold their chariots and horses and went back to open a restaurant: one sold wine in front of people, and the other washed dishes behind people!

Xunzi said: "the voice is not small but not heard, the action is not hidden but invisible."

people who are really wise never show up and speak loudly.

the more they can control the volume, the more tolerant they are.

when you are loud and menacing, contradictions and conflicts will linger.

and when you speak warmly and calmly, ease and joy will come unexpectedly.

tone is lower and the heart is closer.

in a person's life, if you control the volume of your speech, you can grasp the weight of love.

▽

Laozi has a saying: "A loud voice makes an elephant invisible."

the most beautiful sounds and images are often more difficult to detect.

since ancient times, dignitaries whisper: it is a kind of strength to convince people with reason; not to speak loudly, to feel people with emotion, is a kind of self-cultivation; not high-pitched, to love people, is a kind of wisdom.

the size of one's voice cannot be changed, but the volume can be self-controlled.

would like to lower the volume for the rest of my life, be a gentle and determined person, and encounter a life full of goodwill!

author

A book is published under authorization.

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Lin Jing, Department of Chinese

graduated radio host.

May after many years, the story no longer hurts, the sun is still warm, and you are so charming.

Let my voice and other people's stories accompany you every sleepless night.

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