What you have done to others will eventually be fed back to yourself.
there is a saying in the Book of morality: good deeds, no tracks.
people who are really comfortable know how to release their goodness quietly and give others the right fulfillment.
realize the interests of others
Kazuo Inamori said: altruism is self-interest.
abandon the mentality of selfishness and achieve the interests of others, this spirit of altruism will eventually benefit you.
one day, one head was eating delicious fruit, while the other wanted to drink Qingquan.
Qingquan is far away from Meiguo, and the head who eats Meiguo only cares about himself and refuses to meet each other's requirements.
so the head who wanted to drink water was very angry and planned in his heart:
"well, if you eat delicious fruit but don't let me drink water, then I'll eat poisonous fruit."
as a result, the symbiotic bird was poisoned and the two heads died together.
in fact, if one head of that bird can let the other drink water first, and then eat the fruit, it will have nothing to lose.
it is a pity that it ended up like this because it was unwilling to take care of the needs of others.
sometimes, like these two birds, people are not willing to let their own interests suffer a little loss, but also unwilling to fulfill others.
so I got nothing in the end.
self-interest is born, altruism is long.
in dealing with the world, always thinking about yourself will often lead to the result that we lose both sides.
when things happen, thinking of others, thinking of others will benefit not only others, but also yourself.
make others respectable
A psychological study at Harvard University shows that
people always get psychological pleasure in discovering and correcting other people's mistakes, and they are eager to point out other people's mistakes.
but often overlook one thing: almost everyone doesn't like to be pointed at by others, and doesn't want to be discovered and pointed out their own mistakes and defects.
to get along with others, when others make mistakes or embarrassment, it is a kind of wisdom and a rare accomplishment to keep your mouth shut and not to point things out.
Zhang ailing once wrote an article called "the Heart of her stepmother", in which she described some details and feelings about her relationship with her stepmother.
her stepmother, Sun Yongfan, was quite moved when she unwittingly read it.
thinks that this article is specially written for her. As soon as relatives and friends come to the house, she will tell everyone the general idea of the article.
especially likes to tell this story to Zhang Zhiyi, Zhang ailing's father.
as a matter of fact, Zhang ailing wrote this article only to exercise her writing skills and did not intend to please her stepmother.
Zhang Zhiyi knew this well, but in order to protect Sun Yongfan's face and not embarrass her, he echoed every time and never said it directly.
to see through is wisdom, not EQ.
people who really have high EQ will always know how to take care of the self-esteem of others.
keep your mouth shut at the right time, don't ask, see through, don't say anything, and keep a decent place for people.
fulfill the goodwill of others
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I remember once, one of my elders posted a little video of keeping in good health among the relatives.
the original intention of this elder is to express his concern for his loved ones.
but not long after receiving it, a relative replied solemnly below:
"the news is false. Some people have refuted the rumor a long time ago. Don't send such a thing again."
words that he didn't even speak much in the group.
when kindness is poured cold water, the misunderstood kindness will be withdrawn.
only by respecting the good intentions of others and being grateful for their good deeds can we encounter beauty and reap warmth.
in ancient times, there was a Kabuki master named Kan Mi.
once, he deliberately unlaced his shoelaces before performing on stage.
when he was about to play, he was reminded: "your shoelace is loose."
the fan master immediately smiled and thanked each other, and squatted down to tie his shoelaces.
as he approached the entrance to the stage, he squatted down to loosen the shoelace he had just tied.
someone was puzzled and asked him, "Why do you bother?" Why didn't you just tell that person that it was the need for acting? "
Master Kanfan smiled and said, "it is a pleasure to accept other people's kind reminders with gratitude."
it is a virtue to accept and enjoy the kindness of others, and then respond at the right time.
harmonious interpersonal relationships are established little by little in this kind of interaction.
when someone shows kindness to you, it shows that he is caring about you.
accept and be grateful with gratitude in order not to make people feel cold and keep the goodwill going.
fulfill the happiness of others
writer Lu Sihao said:
"one of the signs of a person's lack of self-cultivation is to go to other people's lives to tell them what to do, to easily influence other people's good mood and disturb other people's little happiness."
people live, as long as their own light, do not have to blow out other people's lights.
because most of the time, your casual words are enough to destroy other people's hard-won happiness.
Zhihu blogger Jin Xi said one thing:
one day, he took his wife on an outing when a friend was going to visit a relative in the suburbs, so he stopped by.
along the way, the beautiful scenery outside the window made my wife feel very happy, talking and laughing all the way, contentedly immersed in this rare ease and happiness.
just then, they saw a welcoming motorcade, very luxurious.
my wife said with a smile on her face that she was so lucky today that she came out with joy.
my wife's good mood was suddenly spoiled by this sentence, and the smile on her face disappeared without a trace.
everyone has a self-interpretation of the definition and perception of happiness, and everyone's pursuit of happiness is not the same.
so you don't have to judge other people's lives by your own standards.
it is also a kind of advanced kindness to go your own way, keep your mouth shut and not disturb the happiness of others.
between people, it is a mutual achievement.
you set up the stage for me, I will make way for you, you make me feel comfortable, and I will not add traffic to you.
long-term relationships are established in this virtuous circle of mutual fulfillment and mutual achievement.
, all you have done to others will eventually be fed back to yourself.
: see the girl holding the book, come