For the rest of your life, be sure to walk side by side with people who are comfortable with you.
"Zhuangzi Mountain Tree" says: "the friendship between gentlemen is as light as water, and the friendship between people with humble personality is as sweet as wine."
Gentlemen are acquainted with each other, insipid as water, not deliberately ingratiated, not randomly alienated, making people feel at ease and at ease;
the acquaintance of villains, such as drinking spirits and torturing each other, is difficult to maintain and painful.
in the journey of life, the joy at first sight is not as good as never getting tired of it for a long time. If you want to have a long and comfortable relationship, you can't do without each other's running-in and giving.
it is not until middle age that people understand that the most comfortable relationship between people is to be soft properly, play dumb reasonably, and always be awake.
take softness appropriately
the Book of morality says: "those who are good at fighting do not get angry, those who are gentle do not argue, and those who are good at winning do not fight."
calm mind can achieve atmosphere; silence is the best excuse; do not win or lose, is the greatest victory.
in life, even people who have a good relationship with each other are bound to quarrel and conflict.
if both sides do not admit defeat and hold their own words, they will win the result in the end, but lose the friendship.
it is better not to argue without argument and accept softness appropriately. This is not only the highest realm of retreat, but also the best way to maintain a relationship.
A couple is playing chess at home, watching her husband win.
when the wife saw that she was about to lose, she cheated and said, "my horse can walk in the field, because this is Chollima."
the husband smiled and nodded.
the wife added, "the elephant can cross the river, because it is a flying elephant."
the husband is still smiling and silent.
my wife won the chess game and went to cook happily.
husband and wife are in harmony in this way, and they have been in love with each other for a lifetime. They understand each other and are happy.
Laozi has a saying: "the way of heaven is beneficial but not harmful; the way of saints is for it but not for it."
the really strong will not be in the limelight on trifles and fight for victory or lose. their willingness to accept soft concessions does not mean incompetence, but is more concerned about each other's feelings.
as the saying goes, "fools only compete for high and low, while wise people take retreat as progress."
many relationships are separated because one person is unwilling to yield and the other refuses to give in.
keep fighting for your own interests, although you can win a temporary victory, you will find that if you hurt your feelings, you will lose more.
between people, it is not easy to meet, but it is even more difficult to keep each other. Don't let deep feelings be worn away by trifles.
be soft to each other, bow your head in turn, learn to rein in your competitiveness and be gentle to the people around you in order to maintain a good relationship and make your life go more smoothly.
play dumb reasonably
as the ancients said, "Great wisdom is like a fool, and great cleverness is clumsy."
the highest state of being a man is not shrewdness, but knowing how to play dumb reasonably.
such people look stupid, but in fact they are extremely smart. They can stay away from disasters when things happen and get along well with others.
this is clumsy wisdom and the smartest way to protect yourself.
during the Ming Dynasty, Zhu Yuanzhang went to visit a palace that was about to be completed. He ordered the guards to wait outside the door.
when he entered the hall and looked at the magnificent hall, he could not help feeling complacent and said, "in the past, I only wanted to be a robber, but it was hard to imagine that I had ever sat on the throne."
when he was smug, he suddenly glanced and saw that there was a craftsman painting in the dark.
I immediately panicked and thought, "if this person tells me who I used to be, he will be laughed off."
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Zhu Yuanzhang hurriedly shouted to the craftsman, "come down quickly!" But no one answered even a few shouts.
so he ordered the guards outside the door to call him down. when the craftsman came down, he kowtowed nervously to admit his mistake: "the grass people are deaf and failed to hear the golden words of the holy. Please forgive me."
after listening to this, Zhu Yuanzhang thought to himself: if he were deaf, he would not have heard those words. So he let the craftsman leave.
the craftsman walked out of the temple and sighed a long sigh. He heard Zhu Yuanzhang's words clearly just now. If he hadn't pretended to be deaf, he would have lost his life today.
there are countless smart people in the world, but there are very few smart people who pretend to be stupid.
knowing how to play dumb reasonably is the greatest shrewdness in the world, because they know deeply when to be smart and when to be stupid.
you know: pretending to be stupid is the top wisdom to seek good fortune and avoid evil.
as the saying goes, "there is no way for happiness and misfortune, but people call themselves."
Life goes up and down, and you will encounter a lot of problems in dealing with people, whether it is a blessing or a curse, all on your own.
in fact, pretending to be stupid is not stupid, but he doesn't want to get into trouble.
when you get along with others, it is more difficult to learn to be stupid than to be smart. if you know how to play dumb, many problems will be easily solved, and you will naturally be able to live a safe life.
as the old saying goes, "if you live in a busy city, no one asks, but the rich have distant relatives in the mountains."
the world is cold, as it has been since ancient times.
if you are useful, someone is bound to follow the trend; if you are useless, you will be cold everywhere.
when you are in deep trouble, you can see the cold and warm truth of human feelings.
Tang Bohu, a painter of the Ming Dynasty, was so intelligent that he was admitted to fame at a young age.
for a while, rich villagers came to make friends and chat with him, praising him for his unlimited future.
but in the next year's exam, some people became jealous and reported that Tang Bohu knew the question in advance.
since then, Tang Bohu was discredited, suffered from prison, and completely ruined his future.
not only that, after Tang Bohu was imprisoned, his wife abandoned him, and his younger brother separated from him.
the rich villagers all use him as an after-dinner conversation to make fun of him.
although it was later confirmed that it was not Tang Bohu who knew the topic in advance, it was too late.
after the disaster, he was helpless and destitute, so he could only make a living by selling calligraphy and painting.
Sima Qian has a saying: "the world is all for profit; the world is bustling for profit."
this is the case with human nature. When you have boundless scenery, flowers and applause follow, full of all kinds of praise and flattery.
when you are down and out, I will not hesitate to draw a clear line with you, and even want to have nothing to do with you.
therefore, regardless of the trough or highlight of life, we must keep a clear head and not be misled by the false snobbery.
when you are happy in life, keep a low profile and be modest, constantly polish your strength; when you are in trouble, put down your expectations of others and constantly strengthen yourself.
the rest of life is very long, a little more self-knowledge, less affectionate, regardless of peaks and troughs, can calmly face.
it is said in the Night talk around the stove: "if you pass straight, you will feel bad, but if you pass straight, you will be clumsy."
people also pay attention to a "degree" in dealing with the world.
the most sober way to live is not to be too clear, not to be too clear about things, to advance and retreat with a certain degree, and to be at peace with each other from far to near.
the most important thing for people to get along with others is to be comfortable: those who really treat each other should cherish them; those who pretend to deal with each other should stay away as soon as possible.
be sure to walk side by side with people who are comfortable with each other for the rest of your life.
, may you and I both make good friends, harvest sincerity, and share the ups and downs of life.