May all relationships go both ways.
"the best model of interpersonal relationship is neither over-taking nor over-independence, but mutual affection.
through you come and go, let each other know that I need you, you are kind to me. "
you go back and forth, feelings can last forever, and the longest relationship between people is:
trouble each other and be grateful to each other.
A lot of opportunities are hidden in trouble
when I was a child, my parents would tell me, "Don't bother your friends when you have problems."
when I grow up, I realize that if we don't bother each other, it's hard to build a relationship.
there is a term in psychology called "dependence and incompetence"-
means that many people are afraid to trouble others and are always afraid of causing trouble to others.
but in fact, many opportunities are hidden in trouble.
tell me a story about Steve Jobs.
when he was 12 years old, he wanted to design a mechanical device, but was stuck in the process of making a frequency counter.
he called Bill Hewlett and said his name was Jobs. He wanted to make a frequency counter. He needed some parts and wanted help.
Bill Hewlett didn't know Jobs at all, but decided to supply him with parts and invite him to study at the company.
who is Bill Hewlett? The founder of Hewlett-Packard is known as the father of Silicon Valley.
A phone call not only solved Jobs' technical problems, but also had an inestimable impact on his future.
nine years later, Jobs founded Apple in the basement in 1976, and the products are popular all over the world.
as Jobs said: "I think one thing is very true. The reason why most people lack life experience is that they never ask for help."
in fact, what I fear most about the interaction between people is that if you don't ask, I won't tell.
there is a saying: "if you want to have a long and deep friendship,
you have to learn
, because it gives people a sense of importance and participation. "
sometimes, as long as it is not too modest to ask, the appropriate trouble to others is not a kind of demand, but to maintain a relationship.
it is impossible for a person to go well with the wind and water forever in his life. It is also a kind of wisdom to know how to trouble his friends around him and ask them for help.
perhaps, the dignitaries in your life are hidden behind the trouble.
good relationships are all troubles.
share a short story.
my uncle is a man who is afraid of bothering others.
in the face of the enthusiasm of his neighbors, he is always silent, putting on an expression of "stay away from strangers" every day, and everyone seldom deals with him.
once, he went to work in the field and was bitten by a snake. His neighbor quickly drove him to the hospital.
when he wants to go shopping in the city, he will ask others if they need to bring anything.
he won't refuse when he is invited to his house for a few drinks.
at first, he didn't dare to owe others a favor, but then he took the initiative to bother others.
in the troubles between you and me, his relationship with his neighbors successfully broke the ice.
the relationship between the two people who used to dislike each other is getting deeper and deeper.
there is a door between people.
the process of bothering others is to push this door open.
there is a topic on Weibo: how did you get separated from your friends?
the highly praised answer is explained as follows:
"I used to always ask each other for help when I had nothing to do, but then I became busier and busier at work and had no spare time.
when you encounter a problem, you want to find each other, but you will worry about bothering him, and the distance between the two people will be farther and farther away. "
I quite agree with what this netizen said:
the fear of bothering others has become a stumbling block to building a relationship.
in fact, when a person no longer bothers you, it shows that there is already a gap between you, whether it is family affection, friendship, or love.
when your parents stop bothering you, it's too late for filial piety;
when your lover no longer bothers you, he has already bothered others;
when a friend no longer bothers you, he has become a stranger.
there is a saying: "to be a man, nothing more than you help me, I help you, there are drags and owes between each other, the fate of the relationship will not be broken, and the feelings between people will become deeper and deeper."
only by going back and forth can we have human feelings.
after all, all feelings in this world need to flow in both directions.
be grateful to each other and cherish each other
I agree with one sentence:
behind all the things that are comfortable with each other, there is a quiet accomplishment. The long-term relationship is established in this virtuous circle of mutual perfection.
have you ever felt that there are some people who only show up when they need you? But when you are in trouble, he will always find a way to refuse you.
in fact, behind the trouble is a kind of equivalent exchange.
in this world, no one wants to associate with people who only know how to take but never give.
with reciprocity, the relationship will last longer and longer. All the good people are their own accumulated character.
I read a post before.
several boys are arranged to study English in a small town in England and watch how to become an elegant gentleman.
after a few days, the teacher gave a summary:
you can't learn English in a few days, but it's enough to be a gentleman and be proficient in using one word, but I find it difficult for you to say this simple word.
parents asked excitedly: which one is it?
the teacher held out a finger and said solemnly: Thanks.
perhaps, in the fast-paced moment, we are used to meeting and alienating, accustomed to the coolness of the world, and ignore the warmth of human nature.
perhaps in the eyes of many people: those who feel familiar need not say thank you, while strangers do not deserve to say thank you.
as the saying goes, the grace of dripping water is rewarded by Yongquan.
whether it is a big favor or a small favor, we should learn to be grateful and say thank you!
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No one in this world has an obligation to help us unconditionally.
A thank you and a feedback is not only politeness, but also respect and kindness.
Hemingway once said:
"No man is an island alone in the sea; everyone is like a small piece of soil connected to the whole land."
if two people don't disturb each other, they will never intersect. It is because of the right trouble that the relationship is established.
when you are in trouble, you have someone you can trouble, which is an invisible wealth; when a friend is in trouble, you can become the person he wants to trouble, which is a valuable trust.
A true friend is a soul nurturing
in two bodies.
I think so.
it is your heart that really determines a relationship. A good relationship begins with trouble and lasts longer than gratitude.
, may all relationships go both ways.