Let life turn around gracefully, accept imperfection, and persist in less pain.
Voltaire once said:
"it is not the distant mountain that makes people tired, but a grain of sand in the shoe."
this is also the case in life. What really pains us is not the changes in the outside world, but the entanglements in our hearts.
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it may be a relationship that cannot be put down, an opportunity that passes in a flash, or a sensitive and suspicious nerve.
in the face of the ups and downs of life, if you can't keep an eye on it all the time, it's tantamount to pouring sand into your shoes, making it difficult for yourself.
in the days to come, only by emptying all the sand in your shoes can the road ahead become easier and easier.
set shielding function to the heart
A Qin, a good friend of the writer Jing Jing, is a very sensitive person who is often hurt by sensitivity.
at a sharing meeting, Aqin, as the keynote speaker, was in high spirits when he gave the lecture, but paced nervously back and forth after stepping down.
when the meeting was over, she leaned over and asked Jing Jing:
"do you think I speak badly, nothing new, like a joke?"
Jing Jing was puzzled and immediately said:
"No, you spoke brilliantly."
but when Ah Qin heard this, his eyes turned red.
she said aggrieved:
"when I share, don't you laugh at me when I see you joking with people around me and glancing at me from time to time?"
hearing this, Jing Jing felt puzzled and hastened to explain that he was not laughing at Ah Qin, but praising her for thinking clearly and speaking very well.
colleagues around also testified for Jing Jing, which made Aqin breathe a sigh of relief.
"I was scared to death. I saw the change in your expression. Your palms were so nervous that I was not in the mood to go on."
psychologist Karen Horney said:
"hell on earth" can be divided into "hell of reality" and "hell of mind". If we are too sensitive to the outside world, we will fall into "hell of mind".
A sensitive person always pays special attention to the voice of the outside world, as if every sentence has an implication, and every look is full of meaning.
over time, happiness is pulled away little by little, but sadness is magnified a lot.
but in fact, the troubles of the outside world always exist, and the key depends on how we treat them.
as the writer Ma de said:
"the world seems complicated, with all kinds of people, mud and sand.
in essence, it is your own world.
if you are clear, the world will be clean. If you are simple, the world will not be complicated. "
when we put aside our sensitivities and look down on things, those troubles will disappear.
when we shield ourselves from interference and focus on ourselves, we naturally maintain peace of mind.
Let the regrets of the past turn over in time
psychologist Professor Yakos once said:
"90% of the pain in life comes from unwillingness to stop losses in time."
when you reach a certain age, you will know that life is rarely complete and regrets are hidden everywhere.
if you look back frequently, you will be overwhelmed by the past. Only by turning the page in time can you go far away.
actress Li Tingyi was selected by Qiong Yao to play the role of Xiao Swallow.
but after discussing with her agent, she felt that the play might not be suitable for her, so she politely turned down the opportunity.
unexpectedly, after the broadcast of "returning Pearl", it became popular all over the country, and the little swallow was deeply rooted in the hearts of the people.
when Li Tingyi learned that he beat his chest for missing the opportunity, he was annoyed.
although she filmed well-known plays such as "Young Hero Fang Shiyu" and "No. 8 Pawnshop" at that time, she had accumulated some fame, but she still hated it.
in the rest of her life, as long as she takes part in activities, she will mention missing the performance of the little swallow and cry in front of the camera.
immersed in chagrin, she lost her former brilliance, was absent-minded while filming, and complained repeatedly when chatting with others.
at first, friends and fans chose to understand her, persuading her to forget the past and focus on acting.
but she can't let it go, and even after 20 years, she still sobs about it on the air.
in the past 20 years, no crew is willing to throw an olive branch to her, and her career has been declining and gradually disappeared from the public eye.
along the way of life, you and I have both experienced moments of regret:
I really regret staying in this city. I shouldn't have chosen this job. I'm sorry I didn't keep that person.
but life is like a train without a return trip, blindly looking at the rearview mirror, can not rewrite the ending, will only miss the scenery in front of the window.
Maria Robinson said:
"No one can go back and start over, but everyone can create a new future at this moment."
Life at this moment is more worth grasping than the perhaps better choice in mind.
spare no effort to cultivate every present, you may be able to rewrite your future.
leave room for breathing space for life
do you have such a moment:
when you see a colleague's promotion and raise, he will feel sad that he has not been promoted for the time being.
when I heard that an old friend bought a house and a car, I couldn't bear it.Live a yearning for each other's life;
Open your moments and see other people posting their grades and figures. The more they brush, the more they feel eclipsed.
the more we pay attention to the outside world, the more likely we are to be disturbed by anxiety and unable to focus on our own lives.
in the movie "Brad's midlife crisis", the actor Brad has a gentle wife, does the work he loves, and his son is admitted to a prestigious school.
party, he inadvertently learned that his old classmate had now become an entrepreneur with a decent and beautiful job and a private jet.
looking at himself, he worked hard for many years, but he was still running about for firewood, rice, oil and salt, and his heart could not help but get anxious.
one moment he complains that the house he lives in is too small, and the other he laments that his work is not decent enough. He is eager to change everything, but there is nothing he can do about life.
under great mental pressure, he couldn't sleep all night and looked in a trance.
it was not until by chance that he learned the truth behind the decency of his old classmates:
it turns out that my old classmate did not have a private plane, but only took a company plane to go abroad.
only then did Brad realize that there are unimaginable vicissitudes behind the scenery of others, and the ordinary days in his own eyes are also the dreams of many people.
in life, we often pay attention to the rhythm of the people around us, always wait and see the achievements of our peers, and we can't help being anxious when there is a gap.
however, there is no established route to success, and happiness does not need to meet stringent conditions, but we often measure our lives by the standards of others.
if you want to be happy forever, the most important thing is not to blindly compare the chase, but to protect what you have.
Life is a long journey. Only by keeping your own pace can you get through the fog of anxiety and get closer to happiness step by step.
Let people make an elegant turn
Audrey Hepburn loved ballet when she was young and once regarded ballet as her lifelong dream.
she persists in practicing ballet even though she is wandering and beacon rising every day.
in order to fill the six-year vacancy, Hepburn chose to dance restlessly, even if his toes were stained with blood.
the teacher informed her with great regret:
she has missed the best time to learn ballet, and now no matter how hard she works, she can't become a first-rate dancer.
dance troupe felt sorry for Hepburn, but Hepburn accepted the result calmly.
she said calmly:
"becoming a dancer has always been my dream, but it's not something I can force." Perhaps it is wise to say goodbye to the ballet stage. "
after thinking about it, she no longer insisted on dancing and began filming instead.
unexpectedly, with her elegant temperament, she soon attracted the favor of a number of directors and shone brilliantly in the film and television industry.
writer Lin Yutang once said:
"it is better to give up wisely than to cling blindly."
there are always some things that we have worked hard for a long time but still have no hope. We seem to shout to the empty canyon, but we can never hear the echo.
in the face of such a situation, we often choose to hold on because we are not reconciled to it, but we do not realize that the more we fight, the more difficult it is for ourselves.
the journey of life, the sky that is always expected to be inferior, the summit that cannot be climbed, the life that makes us physically and mentally exhausted, is actually not suitable for us from the very beginning.
instead of being hard on himself on things he is not good at, it is better to change direction in time and complete himself on the right track.
I have heard such a sentence:
"most of the pain in life comes from the fact that we compete with ourselves blindly."
Life is already full of mud and sand, and all we have to do is to pour out the sand in our shoes and return the hardship to zero.
set up a shielding function for the heart, so that there is no trouble in the mind, then you will be free.
Let the regrets of the past turn over in time, put aside the past, and dispel the haze from the bottom of my heart;
leave breathing space for life, focus on yourself, and see the delightful scenery;
Let people turn around gracefully, accept imperfection, and persist in less pain.
although there are dark clouds on the road of life, we keep walking, and eventually there will be a beautiful scene in which the gloom will dissipate and the stars and the moon will grow bright.