From today on, choose the method that suits you and welcome a more extended life together.
are there always two villains fighting in your brain?
want to do something, but can't do it for a long time?
when time is wasted, you will fall into guilt and self-punishment.
at the end of the day, in the eyes of others, you haven't done anything, but in your heart, there have been several big plays.
confusion, anxiety, panic and other negative emotions follow.
it seems that you can not only find the outlet of emotion, but also can not find the outlet of life.
maybe you are caught in "mental internal friction".
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excessive thinking "regurgitation" often makes you fall into the abyss of emotion.
Today, we might as well talk about how to switch "brain circuits" so that we can travel light.
spiritual internal friction, mental drudgery of modern people
Baudrillard said: "Burnout is a disease in modern society."
indeed, our generation is not only prone to physical fatigue, but also prone to internal friction.
We are always twisted and tangled, and we are unable to live in peace with ourselves.
@ Ping an Happy
says that when he is at work, he will often get distracted and wonder if his boyfriend really loves him or not.
when emotions are out of control, even tears can't help but flow out.
in order to hide her embarrassing costume, she had to pick up eye drops, pretend to drop them, and blink again.
although I want to change, I just can't save myself.
said that since the beginning of the internship, the first thing I wake up every day is entanglement.
which solution is better? How should you communicate with your colleagues?
this kind of self-tearing spreads all day.
she often doubts herself whether she is incompetent. Is it not suitable for this job?
say that they are a young man in a small town.
the people around me are either getting married or getting married. It seems that only when they are stable can life be considered a success.
she was also forced to join the ranks of the public exams, but she couldn't read a book and couldn't relax.
in such day-to-day anxiety, she seems to see no hope for life at all.
emotion, work, interpersonal relationship, it seems that every life topic is bothering us.
We are afraid that we will not be able to hand in a full-mark answer, we are afraid of becoming different before we know it, and we are afraid that we will regret it one day in the future.
We stand still in fear, we wear ourselves out in worry.
there always seem to be voices of self-doubt in our minds:
"Why are you so stupid? Why are you so lazy? Why are you the only one having a bad time? What will you do in the future? "
"ruminant thinking" makes you fall into the emotional abyss
Mental internal friction is undoubtedly a bad cold in the soul.
so how did it come into being?
"ruminant thinking" means that individuals cannot help themselves after experiencing unsatisfactory things, such as failure in exams, emotional twists and turns, bad work, and so on.
so that the more you think about it, the angrier you get, the more you think about it, and the more sad you feel.
the following are the more common "ruminant thinking".
accustomed to comparing
from small to big, we always seem to be used to comparison.
when I was young, I was better than my grades, my speed, my parents.
however, if we always compare our own weaknesses with the advantages of others, we can easily become inferiority complex and internal friction.
there is a sentence in "you don't have to compete with others at all":
"once we become a habit of comparing with others, there will be all kinds of problems in our lives, and we will seem to be stuck in a fog and can't find a way out."
High inner sensitivity
someone in Zhihu once asked, what kind of people are most likely to get into internal friction?
A highly liked answer goes like this:
"people with high sensitivity and low self-esteem, who do not dare to fight for or fear conflict and struggle, will have serious mental friction."
it is true that highly sensitive people are always very sympathetic and pay too much attention to details and the opinions of others, and it is easy to let themselves into the trap of self-doubt.
@ Ping an Happy
demanding in everything
there is also a kind of internal consumption type, that is, they are too demanding in everything.
such people are easy to hesitate before making a decision and are perfectionist in doing things.
let yourself fall into a stalemate in how to do the best solution and blame yourself too much.
but everything in the world has its own highs and lows, achievements and failures, good and bad.
No one can occupy the best of everything in the world.
the so-called high requirements, that is, they do not appear.It's real.
switch "brain circuits" to help you travel light
so maybe we can try switching "brain circuits" to find an outlet for our mental internal friction.
sometimes, as long as you turn your mind a little bit, you can let yourself go.
there is a very important concept in positive psychology, which is called topic separation.
is to distinguish between things that can be changed and things that cannot be changed.
the crux of the problem belongs to others, can not be changed, we do not need to delve into.
the crux of the problem belongs to our own things, which can be changed, and we can find ways to deal with it.
learn to separate topics, and you will find that you have fewer problems to deal with at once, and your whole mind will become more refreshing.
accept the status quo
people with internal friction often have a bit of perfectionism on themselves.
in order to pursue high standards and high requirements in mind, it is easy to fall into an emotional dilemma.
believe that everything is the best arrangement.
even if you miss the sun, you can still see the stars; even if you miss the spring flowers, you can still see the autumn moon.
people with internal friction often think more than they do.
the best way to solve internal friction is to refuse to procrastinate and improve your action.
it is far better to learn to try and make mistakes than to fall into the trap of perfectionism.
if you want to learn to cook, do it; if you want to learn photography, shoot it; if you want to learn to write, write.
take the first step and you will find that everything will not be so difficult.
another characteristic of people who have long-term internal friction is that they are willing to think wishfully and are unable to stay focused.
improving concentration can not only maintain an efficient state of work and life, but also keep people away from internal friction.
finding something you like and letting yourself experience the immersion of flow is the only way to improve your concentration.
of course, getting enough sleep and exercise can also make people's thoughts clearer and their state more refreshing.
starting today, choose the method that suits you and welcome a more extended life together.
Luo Xiang once said: "Internal friction is normal and conforms to the second law of thermodynamics. As long as everything in the world exists, it will be in a state of consumption."
after all, in this life, everyone has a time to encounter problems, and everyone has a time to get into trouble.
to learn to coexist with internal friction, not to take it seriously, to live with symptoms, perhaps, is also an attitude.
, may you stay away from internal friction and let yourself go.
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